Not Forgotten

As the soft piano notes of Chris Rice's "Untitled Hymn" fall upon my ears, a vision floats in front of my eyes. A face full of joy, a gentle smile plays across her face as her tiny figure gracefully twirls on stage. She is wearing a long white gown that catches her moves with a suprising amount of dignity. She seems to be drinking in every word, feeling it with every beat of her heart.

Her name was Lauren Castanza. She went to my college. Two summers ago, she fell from a waterfall to her death. She was going to be a doctor, if I remember correctly. She was smart and incredibly outgoing. It seemed as though the whole campus knew her. Coming back to college after that summer was so strange. It felt like a light had gone out, and nobody could bring it back.

That last semester, she was in my suite a lot. She was really close with one of my suitemates, yet how many times did I notice her there in that next door room and not even stop to say hello?

I heard later that her faith was the most powerful and genuine faith that many had ever seen. I heard that she had commented to a friend how she never felt so close to God as she did that last semester, right before God took her home.

Was God preparing her to meet with him in just a few short weeks? It makes me shudder. In a good way, perhaps?

It's strange. All of her hopes and dreams. God knew from before that moment when she took her first breath...He knew that her last breath would be before those hopes and dreams would ever be realized. Lauren would never be a doctor. She applied to Grove City College. He knew she'd never graduate. But He did know that she would be an amazing witness for Him. He planned something infintely better than any of us could ever imagine.

And that song. When she danced, did she know how those words would come true for her?

...fall on Jesus, fall on Jesus, fall on Jesus...and live.

Yes, she fell. But she fell on Jesus, and she now lives with Him.

...with your final heartbeat, kiss the world goodbye, go in peace and laugh on glory's side... and fly to Jesus, fly to Jesus, fly to Jesus...and live.

I still remember her clutching her chest, bending over, and lightly tiptoeing backwards to capture the mood of that final verse. She danced this verse beautifully, causing tears to spring into everyone's eyes at her memorial service.

I didn't know Lauren well, though I wish I had. In fact, I don't even know if she knew my name. But I know I will never forget her. Christ was the One who made her shine. If only the same could be true of all of us...

"Weak and wounded sinner
Lost and left to die
O, raise your head, for Love is passing by
Come to Jesus
Come to Jesus
Come to Jesus and live!

Now your burden’s lifted
And carried far away
And precious blood has washed away the stain...so
Sing to Jesus
Sing to Jesus
Sing to Jesus and live!

And like a newborn baby
Don’t be afraid to crawl
And remember when you walk, sometimes we fall...so
Fall on Jesus
Fall on Jesus
Fall on Jesus and live!

Sometimes the way is lonely
And steep and filled with pain
So if your sky is dark and pours the rain...then
Cry to Jesus
Cry to Jesus
Cry to Jesus and live!

O, and when the love spills over
And music fills the night
And when you can’t contain your joy inside...then
Dance for Jesus
Dance for Jesus
Dance for Jesus and live!

And with your final heartbeat
Kiss the world goodbye
Then go in peace, and laugh on glory’s side...and
Fly to Jesus
Fly to Jesus
Fly to Jesus and live!"

(post written by Kristin)